LizardPeopleMeet, the Dating Site For Reptilians


Originally Published 2016

Are you a lonely shape-shifting Reptilian stranded on this damned backwards planet waiting for Nibiru to come back? Is being part of a millennia-old conspiracy to enslave humanity just not distracting you enough from your unfulfilled cold-blooded scaly carnal hunger? Are you Dick Cheney? Then the hot new dating site LizardPeopleMeet is for you.

LizardPeopleMeet promises to help you “connect with Lizard People from all over the galaxy right from the comfort of the home you recently invaded.” As a registered member, you can express a preference for Another Lizard Person, a Human Slave, or Not Dick Cheney.

suave mother**king lizard mother**ker

Whether you’re only in it for the sex, or looking to instead create a hybrid lizard/human subspecies to populate your new Discovery Channel reality show, LizardPeopleMeet seems to have your needs covered. And if you are a human looking for love, why not give the site a shot anyway? It certainly can’t be any more of a risk than the Craigslist personals.